1. You know someone who knows someone who knows someone that can introduce you to someone for a job interview
2. You browse the deli shelves, overlooking the parmigiano or the camembert, looking for the feta cheese
3. You‘re fed up with all the “naawwwwww”s every time a cute baby/puppy/kitten/duckling appears on TV
4. You don’t really get the love affair between the Brits and their tea
5. But then someone invites you for “tea” and you end up being really confused…
6. You think you just asked for two beers…
… Whereas in fact you’ve just given the bartender the finger(s).
7. You keep searching for that perfect iced coffee…
… In a country that loves hot tea. Even in the summer.
8. You add “please” at the end of each sentence…
… Ending up with ridiculous phrases, like “Good morning, please!” and “See you soon, please!”.
9. You are getting tired of people asking you if you are from Spain
No, I’m from the other European country that went bankrupt.
12. You’ve never watched Big Brother, the Apprentice or Eastenders
13. You say “to-mey-to”…
… They say “to-ma-to”.
14. This is what happens when you go around telling everyone your ancestors invented democracy and philosophy
You think 22:00 is the perfect time to have dinner
You are on your own there, mate.
It takes you ages to figure out what’s wrong with words like “color” and “specialization”
15. No girl will ever love you as much as your mummy. Or cook as well as your mummy. Or iron like your mummy…
16. You think your British friends are joking when they tell you that summer normally lasts for a week
Then you get it.